Observing Kids

We've had a rough day in our house today. For the most part, I've felt like a parent who really can't parent. We've had unusual hitting, pushing and random acts of destruction. It's a bit disturbing. I can't ever tell what brings it on or figure out where it comes from--fatigue, clash of personalities, disappointment?

I was glad to have had the chance to 'observe' my kids this morning. I really wish for more two-way mirrors, especially at school. Our gym is fortunate enough to have its Kids Gym area on the basketball court, which can be seen from the actual gym. So I have the luxury of watching my kids play without them knowing it--unless they look up and catch me in the act.

Not really wanting to work out today, I decided to take the time to see how they interact with other kids. Alex runs immediately into the group and scopes out who looks like the cool kids to play with. He hovers, as if checking them out. Hovers enough so they notice him lurking. Sure enough, one kid goes over and talks to him and they are immediate friends. When he tires of them, he heads for the game/puzzle table.

Anna immediately heads to the craft table to color. After doing a drawing or five, she tries to find some girls to play with. I see her following some older girls who don't notice her, and Anna gives up and runs to some boys to play with. I guess it's her rough n' tough attitude. She seems to teeter between playing with boys or coloring. Perhaps she's just trying to find her place in a world where she wants to be a girl, but her role model is a very tough four-year old. The good news is neither child is shy, but with their assertive personalities, I'm afraid they may have trouble keeping friends.

Oh, parenting is hard!

1 comment:

Anna from BC Canada said...

Evan is "friend forcer" he follows a kid around until the kid notices him. As an adult, this would be annoying wouldn'it it? But Im hoping it is a habit he will lose in kindergarten. Some kids find this OK, others find it `creepy`. But how do you tell a 4 year old not to do this. IM glad he is outgoing but......