Mommies In the After Hours

Moms want to have fun too. Stay-at-home moms have their former lives they may cling to in the hopes of someday resurrecting their career or possibly just using the skills for another job. Those who work outside the home have it even tougher as they have to come home to the same nonsense we SAHMs deal with all day only after a long day of dealing with work nonsense. (I don't miss that!) When do moms get to be themselves and do what they love?

I'd like to think we all once had some interests and hobbies before we had children. But how do you continue to enjoy them when you have work and home responsibilities? Back in the day I use to play the flute--with a wind ensemble. It wasn't much but it forced me to play. Then I went on to take private lessons from a graduate music student. Unfortunately, I haven't found a venue since having kids--that meets with my own schedule--to continue this interest.

But I was very fortunate to hear my friend Jenn sing last week with her a capella group Kismet at Jammin Java. There she was a full-time mom and four months pregnant with her second baby belting out La Isla Bonita and clearly channeling her inner Madonna. How does she find the energy for this?

Another friend of mine takes guitar lessons as a nearby music school. And still another mommy friend will be part of the cast of Urinetown. I have another friend who quilts regularly with her quilting group. Suddenly I'm thinking I should stop using mommyhood as an excuse not to pick up my flute anymore. Although, then I realized that my after hours are spent writing this blog and/or trying to finish our book. Perhaps the music will have to wait.


Anonymous said...

I'm a flute player too! I played in college (Univ of Oklahoma - PRIDE) and while I wasn't a music major, my husband is a professional musician and since marrying him I always feel a little self-concious about my amateur flute playing. I would love to find an ensemble or small orchestra, etc around town to play with. Occasionally, my dear mother-in-law will bribe me to play at church when we go home for Christmas or other holidays and sometimes I agree, but with a toddler who HATES the sound of the flute, it is hard to find time to practice since our home is usually filled with sounds of trumpeting - loud trumpeting. My dream of becoming a dental hygienist went down the drain when I moved out to D.C. from a nice, cozy, friendly college town in Oklahoma. I often wonder the same thing... What is the "thing" that keeps me sane when my SAHMom job ends at the end of the day or on the weekend when my husband is home to watch our daughter? Sure, I knit, I bake, I like to watch movies, scrapbook, etc., but WHO AM I other than MOM? Hopefully when my second child is in preschool or elementary school I can resume classes and reach my goal of becoming a dental hygienist and FINALLY go to work. I'm just wondering will anything ever be as fulfilling as my job as a SAH mom?

Laura said...

we should play duets sometime! andrew told me you play last time i was there. i'd love to get my flute out, it's been a while for me as well.